This blog post is all about old women jokes that will make you laugh out loud. If you are looking for a good laugh, then this is the post for you!
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Jokes About Old Women
Why did the old woman wear her glasses on her head? So she could see over the top of her bifocals! If you want to make an old woman laugh, tell her a joke! We’ve rounded up the best, funniest jokes about old women that will make you laugh out loud.
Old women and their wrinkles
We all love a good laugh, and what better way to enjoy a chuckle than with a joke about old women? Here are some hilarious jokes about old women that will have you laughing out loud.
Why do old women have wrinkles?
– Because they’ve been through a lot of shit!
What do you call an old woman with a perm?
– A hostage taker!
Why are old women so mean?
– They’ve had enough crap from life, and they’re not going to take any more crap from anybody!
Old women and their hearing
There was an old woman who wanted to join a club, but she was told that she had to take a hearing test first.
The woman went into the room and the doctor asked her, “What is 17 plus 24?”
The woman thought for a moment and then said, “41!”
The doctor was surprised and said, “That’s correct, how did you know?”
The woman replied, “I remembered from when I was in school.”
Old women and their memories
Why do old women remember their childhoods so vividly?
Because they’re hoping someone will finally believe them when they tell their stories.
Jokes About Old Women That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud
Old women are often the butt of many jokes, but there are some jokes about old women that are actually funny. Here are a few examples:
Old women and their wrinkles
There’s nothing wrong with a few wrinkles. In fact, many women believe that their wrinkles are a badge of honor, earned through years of laughter, love, and life experience. If you’re looking for a laugh, check out these jokes about old women and their wrinkle-free faces.
What do you call an old woman with no wrinkles?
An ironing board!
Why don’t old women have wrinkles on their stomachs?
Because they’ve been suckin’ in their gut since they were little girls!
Why don’t old women have wrinkles on their foreheads?
Because they don’t have brains!
How can you tell if an old woman has had a facelift?
If she has teeth where her eyebrows used to be!
Old women and their hearing
A woman went to her doctor for a physical. The doctor took some measurements and then told the woman, “I’m sorry to have to tell you this, but you are overweight.”
The woman was outraged and began to berate the doctor, telling him how hard she worked to stay in shape, how she only ate healthy foods, and how she exercised regularly.
The doctor calmly listened to the woman’s rant before interjecting, “That may all be true, but you are still overweight.”
“Damn it!” the woman exclaimed. “How much do I need to lose?”
“Ten pounds,” the doctor replied.
The woman looked puzzled and said, “But I only weigh 140 pounds now.”
“I know,” the doctor said. “But you’re seven feet tall.”
Old women and their memories
We all know that old women have great memories. They can remember things that happened fifty years ago as if they happened yesterday. But there are some things that they would rather forget. Here are some jokes about old women that will make you laugh out loud.
Do you know why old women always have a smile on their face? Because they can’t remember where they put their teeth!
How do you know when an old woman is going to tell you a story? When she begins with, “Let me tell you what my grandmother told me…”
Why do old women wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm!
Why are old women so bad at sewing? Because they can’t see their needles!
What’s the best way to talk to an old woman? Loudly and slowly!