Looking for a good laugh? Check out our collection of funny United Airlines jokes. From passengers to pilots, we’ve got all the jokes you need to make your next flight a little more enjoyable.
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United Airlines Jokes
United Airlines has been in the news a lot lately, and not in a good way. First, there was the incident where a passenger was dragged off a plane. Then, a dog died on a United flight after being forced into an overhead bin. To top it all off, a scorpion fell from an overhead bin and stung a passenger. With all of this negative publicity, you might be wondering if anyone still flies United. Well, the answer is yes. People are still flying United, and some of them are even making jokes about the airline.
Why did United Airlines cross the road?
To get to the other side! Just kidding, we would never jokes about such a large and important airline. United Airlines is one of the biggest and most popular airlines in the world, so it’s no surprise that there are plenty of jokes out there about them.
Why did United Airlines cross the road?
To get to the other side! Just kidding, we would never jokes about such a large and important airline. United Airlines is one of the biggest and most popular airlines in the world, so it’s no surprise that there are plenty of jokes out there about them.
What do you call a United Airlines pilot?
A captain! We know, we know, it’s not that funny. But we had to include at least one aviation joke on this list!
How many passengers does a United Airlines plane have?
Enough to fill it up! Seriously though, United Airlines planes can seat anywhere from 100 to 700 passengers depending on the model of plane. That’s a lot of people!
Why did United Airlines go bankrupt?
Because they ran out of fuel! This is another aviation joke but it’s also a pretty clever play on words. Get it? “Fuel” and “funds”? We’re hilarious, we know.
How many United Airlines employees does it take to change a light bulb?
United Airlines has a reputation for poor customer service, and it seems that their employees are the butt of many jokes. But how many United Airlines employees does it take to change a light bulb?
The answer, according to most jokes, is quite a few! In one version of the joke, it takes four United Airlines employees to change a light bulb – one to hold the ladder, one to hold the bulb, and two to argue about who should get the Frequent Flyer miles for changing it.
In another version, it takes six United Airlines employees to change a light bulb – one to get on the plane, one to fly to where the light bulb is, one to change the light bulb, one to fly back, one to get off the plane, and one to lose your luggage.
And in yet another version, it takes eight United Airlines employees to change a light bulb – one to deny that there is a problem, one to blame the customer for causing the problem, one to blame the other airlines for causing the problem, one to blame the government for causing the problem, one To tell you that you’re not entitled to compensation because it’s not our fault there’s a problem, one To ask you for a favor in exchange for changing the light bulb , One who changes the light bulb without telling you ,one To bill you for changing the light bulb.
So how many United Airlines employees does it take to change a light bulb? The answer seems to be: quite a few!
What’s the difference between United Airlines and a piñata?
What’s the difference between United Airlines and a piñata?
With a piñata, you get your candy.
More United Airlines Jokes
United Airlines is having a really tough time lately. From overbooking flights to passengers getting dragged off the plane, they can’t seem to catch a break. But in the midst of all this, we can’t forget that they’re still one of the biggest airlines in the world. So, in the spirit of making light of a difficult situation, here are some more United Airlines jokes.
How many United Airlines pilots does it take to change a light bulb?
How many United Airlines pilots does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just leave it in Atlanta.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
How many United Airlines customer service representatives does it take to change a light bulb?
We’re sorry, but due to a power outage, we are unable to change your light bulb at this time. Please try again later.
Even More United Airlines Jokes
Why did United Airlines go bankrupt?
The airline decided to stop flying and focus on its core competency: baggage handling.
How many United Airlines employees does it take to change a light bulb?
How manyUnited Airlines employees does it take to change a light bulb?
-1 to screw in the new bulb
-1 to take the old bulb and put it back in the box
-1 to talk to the customer and explain that the flight is delayed because they are waiting for a new light bulb
-1 supervisor to observe
-2 security guards to keep an eye on the crowd
-1 pilot to announce over the intercom that they are sorry for the delay, but they are waiting for a new light bulb
What’s the difference between United Airlines and a piñata?
What’s the difference between United Airlines and a piñata?
One is filled with candy and surprises, and the other is often used as a target for people to take their frustrations out on.
