We all need a good laugh every now and then, and what better way to do that than with some funny tool jokes? Whether you’re a carpenter, a plumber, an electrician, or just a handyman around the house, these jokes will have you laughing in no time.
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Table of Contents
Jokes about Tools
Jokes about hammers
Why did the hammer go to the therapist?
Because it had a lot of issues with hitting things!
Jokes about saws
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other saw.
Why did the woodchuck cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Jokes about screwdrivers
Why did the screwdriver go to the bar?
To get screwed!
Why did the electrician use a Phillips head screwdriver?
Because he wanted left-handed screws!
Jokes about Tool Users
If you work with tools or know someone who does, then you’ll appreciate these funny tool jokes. From electricians to mechanics, these jokes are sure to get a laugh out of anyone who uses tools. So, whether you’re looking for a laugh or just want to make someone smile, check out these jokes about tool users.
Jokes about carpenters
Why did the Carpenter break up with his girlfriend?
Because she took him for granted.
Why did the Carpenter cross the road?
To get to the other hammer.
Why are carpenters such bad liars?
Because they’re always measuring things.
Why was the Carpenter’s house so messy?
Because he had sawdust in his eyes.
Jokes about plumbers
What do you call a plumber with half a brain? Gifted.
What do you call a plumber who’s lost his license? A pipe dreamer.
Why are plumbers such bad liars? Because they’re always backed up.
Jokes about mechanics
Why did the mechanic go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling low on oil!
Why did the mechanic get fired from his job?
Because he couldn’t wrench!
Why don’t mechanics trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
Jokes about Tool Companies
Are you looking for a laugh? Do you like tool jokes? If so, you’re in the right place. In this article, we’ve collected some of the best tool jokes out there. From jokes about saws to jokes about screws, we’ve got plenty of material to make you chuckle.
Jokes about Home Depot
How many Home Depot employees does it take to change a light bulb?
Just one, but he’ll need four hours to find it in the store.
Why did the Home Depot employee cross the road?
Because he was tired of working at Lowe’s.
What’s the difference between a Home Depot employee and a vampire?
A vampire only sucks blood at night.
Jokes about Lowe’s
Lowe’s is one of the biggest home improvement stores in the United States. They sell everything from appliances to power tools. But they’re also known for their sense of humor. Here are some of the best jokes about Lowe’s:
Why did Lowe’s invent the self-checkout?
To make sure that their customers are as confused as possible.
Why did Lowe’s invent the Returns Department?
To make sure that their customers are even more confused than before.
How does Lowe’s keep its employees motivated?
With a never-ending supply of tape measures.
Jokes about Menard’s
Q: What’s the best thing about Menard’s?
A: The prices are really cheap!