Looking for a laugh? Check out our collection of funny Switzerland jokes. From classic Swiss cheese jokes to puns about cuckoo clocks, we’ve got something to make you smile.
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Table of Contents
Swiss Jokes
Why did the Swiss miss the boat? Because they were obsessed with making their watches water-resistant! If you’re looking for a good laugh, check out our collection of Swiss jokes. From puns to one-liners, we’ve got you covered.
The Swiss and the Germans
Why don’t the Swiss and the Germans get along?
Because the Swiss have all the money and the Germans have all the brains.
The Swiss and the French
Why did the Swiss cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the French cross the road?
To get to the Swiss!
The Swiss and the British
Why are the Swiss always so calm? Because they have all those great Alps to hide behind!
Why don’t the British like the Swiss? Because they’re not really British!
Why are the Swiss always late? Because they have to stop and watch the cows cross the road!
What do you call a Swiss roll? A roll in the Alps!
What do you call a Swiss army knife? A knife in the back!
Swiss Puns
Switzerland is known for its chocolate, its banks, and its neutrality. But did you know that it’s also a great source of puns? Here are some of the best Swiss puns to make you smile.
The Swiss and the Germans
There once was a German who went to Switzerland and saw a beautiful Swiss girl. He asked her to marry him, and she said yes.
A few months later, they had a beautiful baby girl.
The German man was so happy that he went back to Germany and told all of his friends about his beautiful Swiss wife and child.
One of his friends said, “You’re lucky that she’s Swiss. If she was German, she would have demanded a divorce by now.”
The Swiss and the French
What do you call a Swiss army knife in French? A couteau suisse!
The Swiss and the British
The Swiss and the British are two nations which are often comically compared to one another. The Swiss are often thought of as being very efficient and uptight, while the British are often considered to be more relaxed and easy-going.
Here are some funny jokes about the Swiss and the British which will make you smile:
Why did the Swiss miss out on the industrial revolution?
Because they were too busy making clocks!
Why don’t the Swiss like to waste time?
Because they know it’s all relative!
Why are there so many Swiss watches in British homes?
Because the Brits like to be on time!
What do you call a group of Swiss cowboys?
A yodel herd!
Swiss One-Liners
If you’re looking for some Swiss-themed humor, look no further! Here are some of the best Swiss jokes out there. From jokes about the Swiss Army to puns about cheese, there’s something here for everyone. So sit back, relax, and enjoy a good laugh.
The Swiss and the Germans
Why did the Swiss guy cross the road?
To get to the other side of the German border!
What do you call a Swiss army knife?
A German Shepherd!
The Swiss and the French
Why don’t the Swiss and the French get along?
Because the Swiss are not flavored!
The Swiss and the British
The Swiss and the British are both famous for their love of order, so it’s no surprise that they would have a few things in common. For example, both countries have a long tradition of watchmaking, and both are known for their punctuality.
It’s also no surprise that the two nations would have a few differences. For example, the British are known for their love of tea, while the Swiss are known for their love of chocolate. And while the British are known for their stiff upper lip, the Swiss are known for their relaxed attitude to life.
So what happens when you put a Swiss person and a British person together? Well, you get some pretty funny jokes, that’s what!
