Looking for a good laugh? Check out our collection of funny and smart blond jokes. We’re sure you’ll find something to make you chuckle.
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Introduction
We all know blondes are not stupid, but sometimes they say or do things that make us laugh. Here are some funny and smart blond jokes that will make you smile.
Why did the blonde put her finger over the nail when she was hammering?
The noise gave her a headache!
How do you keep a blonde in suspense?
Tell her a joke and don’t tell her the punch line.
What’s a blonde’s favorite fruit?
A cherry!
What does a blonde say when you ask her if her blinker is working?
Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no, yes, no…
Blond Jokes
Why did the blond get in the fridge?
What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted!
Here are some really funny and smart blond jokes. We hope you enjoy them!
What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted!
Why did the blonde scale the chain-link fence? To see what was on the other side!
What does a blonde say when you blow in her ear? Thanks for the refill!
Why did the blonde get lost in the grocery store? Because she was walking around in circles!
How do you confuse a blonde? You don’t. They’re born that way!
Why did the blonde throw margarine out the window? To see butter fly!
Why did God create blondes? Because virgins aren’t as fun as they used to be!
How do you keep a blonde in suspense? (I’ll tell you tomorrow.)
How do you keep a blonde in suspense? (I’ll tell you tomorrow.)
Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? Because it said ‘concentrate’!
Why did the blonde stare at the can of frozen orange juice for two hours? Because it said ‘concentrate’!
What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted!
How does a blonde spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
What do you call a blonde with half a brain? Gifted!
How does a blonde spell farm? E-I-E-I-O
What’s the difference between a blonde and a telephone pole? The telephone pole is usually smarter!
Smart Blond Jokes
A blonde walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender says “You’re out of luck. We’ve been closed for fifteen minutes.”
A blonde walks into a bar and asks for a ‘double entendre’.
A blonde walks into a bar and asks for a ‘double entendre’. The bartender gives her one, and she thanks him before walking away.
A few minutes later, a brunette walks into the bar and asks for the same drink. The bartender tells her that he’s all out of double entendres, but she can have a single if she’d like.
A blonde walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some bottom deodorant. The assistant, a little bemused, explains to the blonde that they don’t sell bottom deodorant, and never have. Undeterred, the blonde assures the assistant that she has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more.
At this point, the assistant is getting a bit annoyed, and asks the blonde where she has been buying it from. The blonde replies, “from the other side of the road.”
A blonde walks into a bank and asks for a loan. The bank manager says, “You will need to put up some collateral.” The blonde asks, “What’s collateral?” The bank manager says, “Something of value that we can take if you don’t repay the loan.” The blonde says, “OK, I’ll give you my car.”
The blonde walks out to the parking lot and comes back in a few minutes later with a bag of money. She says to the bank manager, “Here’s the $25,000 you asked for.” The bank manager is surprised and asks how she got the money so fast. The blonde says, “I had to sell my car.”
