Funny Planet Jokes You’ve Never Heard Before

A collection of the funniest Planet jokes you’ve never heard before. If you’re looking for a good laugh, you’ve come to the right place!

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We all know that our solar system is full of planets that are uniquely different from one another. But did you know that these planets also have a sense of humor? Here are some funny planet jokes that you’ve never heard before!

Q: What do you call a lazy Mars rover?
A: Phobos-napping!

Q: How do astronomers measure the distance to Jupiter?
A: They use a jov-a-meter!

Q: What’s the most popular type of music on Saturn?
A: Ur-anus!

Q: What do you call an endorsement by Venus?
A: A venus flytrap!

The Best Planet Jokes

Everyone knows at least one joke about Earth, but what about the other planets in our solar system? Here are some of the best planet jokes you’ve never heard before!


Mercury is the smallest planet in our solar system and is closest to the sun. It’s also the closest planet to Earth, which makes it a popular target for space missions. Mercury is a barren, cratered world that looks much like our moon.

Mercurial facts:
-Mercury is named after the Roman god of commerce, travel and thievery.
-The planet Mercury was known to the ancient Egyptians, Greeks and Romans.
-Mercury has a diameter of 3,031 miles (4,879 kilometers), about two-fifths the size of Earth.
-Mercury is 36 million miles (58 million kilometers) from the sun, or about one-third as far as Earth is from the sun. A year on Mercury lasts just 88 days.
-A day on the surface of Mercury lasts 176 Earth days.
-One side of Mercury always faces toward the sun while the other side faces away — just like our moon orbiting Earth. An “day” on Mercury (the time it takes for one rotation) would last 176 Earth days long!
-Because it has almost no atmosphere to retain heat, temperatures on Mercury swing wildly between 800F during the day and -275F at night.


Why is Venus so hot?
Because it’s closer to the sun!

What’s the difference between Venus and Jupiter?
One is a giant gas planet, and the other is a Venutian!

Why don’t we have any missions to Venus?
Because it’s too hard!


Why did the chicken go to space?
To get to the other side of the universe!

Why did the aliens invade Earth?
To abduct its leader!

What do you call a planet that’s made entirely of diamonds?
Sparkle World!

What do you call an Earthling with no sense of humor?
A satellite dish!


Why did the chicken cross the road to get to Mars?

To get to the other side!


Why is Jupiter so round? Because it never took algebra!

Why does Jupiter have so many moons? Because it never took geometry!

What’s the difference between Jupiter and a meteor? One’s a giant gas planet, the other’s a space rock!

Why is Jupiter the most popular planet? Because it’s a jovial giant!


Saturn is the second largest planet in our solar system, and it’s famous for its stunning rings. But there’s plenty more to this planet than meets the eye. Here are some fun facts and jokes about Saturn that will make you see it in a whole new light!

Saturn is made mostly of hydrogen and helium, which makes it The gas giant has an average temperature of -178 degrees Celsius, but can reach as low as -209 degrees Celsius at the poles.
The day on Saturn lasts for 10 hours 33 minutes, while a year on the planet last for 29.5 Earth years.
Saturn is home to 62 moons, including the largest moon in our solar system, Titan.

Why did Saturn turn red? Because it rusts!

Why are Saturn’s rings always sticking together? Because they’re in love!

Why was Saturn so sad? Because its rings were taken away!


Uranus is the seventh planet from the sun, and it’s probably best known for its unusual name and orbit. It’s also the coldest planet in the solar system, and it has a lot of strange features, like a tilted axis and rolling moons.

Here are some funny planet jokes that you’ve probably never heard before!

Why is Uranus so cold?
Because it’s so far from the sun!

Why does Uranus have a weird orbit?
Because it was hit by a planet-sized meteor!

Why does Uranus have such a tilted axis?
Because it was hit by a planet-sized meteor!


Neptune is the eighth and farthest known planet from the Sun in the Solar System. In the 1830s, John Herschel suggested naming it after the Roman god of the sea.

Q: Why did Neptune cross the road?
A: To get to the other tide!


We hope you enjoyed our selection of funny planet jokes! If you have any other favorites that we’ve left out, be sure to let us know in the comments below!

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