Looking for a good laugh? Check out these funny peanut butter jokes! From clever puns to silly one-liners, these jokes are sure to make you chuckle.
Checkout this video:
Jokes
Short jokes
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
How do you throw a space party?
You planet!
Want to hear a construction joke?
Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one.
Why did the gym close down?
It just didn’t work out!
You know what I saw today?
Everything I looked at.
Longer jokes
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the other side!
Q: Why did the duck cross the road?
A: To get to the other side!
Q: Why did the mosquito cross the road?
A: To get to the other side!
Q: Why did the banana cross the road?
A: Because he was sick of being mashed!
Q: Why did the boy cross the road?
A: To get to school!
Funny stories
Peter Pan peanut butter has been around since 1923, and it’s no secret why it’s still one of the most popular peanut butter brands today. Not only is it delicious, but it’s also versatile and perfect for a variety of recipes. And, of course, it has a sense of humor.
About a time you got peanut butter stuck to the roof of your mouth
It was one of those days. You know the ones. You wake up and just from the second your eyes open, you know it’s going to be one of THOSE days. I had a project due at work, my car needed an oil change, and my dog had just thrown up on the carpet. But I tried to put on a brave face and face the day head on.
I made my coffee and sat down at the kitchen table to check my email. And that’s when I saw it. A email from my boss with the subject line “URGENT: Peanut Butter Recall”.
Apparently there had been a recall on peanut butter products due to a possible salmonella contamination. And not just any peanut butter, but the brand that I had bought and eaten nearly every day for the past year.
I immediately started Googling “peanut butter salmonella” and “symptoms of salmonella poisoning”. Surely I hadn’t eaten enough contaminated peanut butter to make me sick… right?
But then I remembered the time I got peanut butter stuck to the roof of my mouth and had to scrape it off with my toothbrush. Was that enough to contaminate me?
I started to feel nauseous just thinking about it. I was pretty sure I hadSymptoms of Salmonella Poisoningand there was no way I could go into work feeling like this. So I called in sick and spent the rest of the day Googling my symptoms and watching old episodes of The Office on Netflix.
Fortunately, I didn’t have salmonella poisoning and after a few days of rest, I was back to my old self again. But that experience definitely taught me to be more careful with what I eat!
About a time you made a sandwich and the peanut butter was too hard/too soft
When it comes to making a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, there’s a right way and a wrong way. If the peanut butter is too hard, it won’t spread evenly and you’ll end up with big clumps of peanut butter in your sandwich. If the peanut butter is too soft, it will squish out the sides of the bread and make a big mess. But if you get the perfect consistency, you’ll have a delicious sandwich that’s easy to eat and fun to make.
Here are some funny stories about people who got their peanut butter sandwiches just wrong:
I was making a PB&J for my daughter one day and I couldn’t find the peanut butter. I looked in all the cabinets and finally found it in the fridge. I thought to myself, “That’s weird, why would they put the peanut butter in the fridge?” I guess my daughter likes her PB&Js cold!
I was making a PB&J for my son one day and he wanted me to put chocolate chips in it. I said, “No way, that’s not how you make a PB&J.” He said, “But Mom, everyone at school puts chocolate chips in their PB&Js!” I guess he was right, because now I always put chocolate chips in my PB&Js too.
I was making a PB&J for my husband one day and he wanted me to add bacon. I said, “No way, that’s not how you make a PB&J.” He said, “But honey, bacon makes everything better!” I had to agree with him on that one, so now I always add bacon to our PB&Js.
Peanut butter puns
If you’re looking for some funny peanut butter jokes, you’ve come to the right place. Peanut butter is a staple in many households and there are so many ways to enjoy it. Whether you like it smooth or crunchy, there’s a way to enjoy peanut butter for everyone. Let’s take a look at some of the best jokes about peanut butter.
Puns that are short
Here are some funny peanut butter puns that are sure to make you laugh.
-What do you call a peanut butter sandwich that is afraid of getting dirty? A clean freak!
-What do you call a peanut butter sandwich that is sad? A downer!
-What do you call a peanut butter sandwich that is always happy? A perky nutter!
-What do you call a peanut butter sandwich that is always hungry? A bottomless pit!
Puns that are longer
These Peanut Butter Puns Will Make You Laugh Out Loud
Don’t you just love a good pun? If you’re looking for some hilarious peanut butter jokes, then you’ve come to the right place. From clever one-liners to dad jokes that will make you groan, we’ve rounded up the best peanut butter puns around. So go ahead and spread the laughter with these funny food puns that will have everyone in stitches.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Why don’t peanuts belong in math class? Because they can’t compute!
Why did the coach go to jail? For putting all of his players on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!
How do you make a hobo stew? Put him in a pot and boil him for three days!
What to do if you’re out of peanut butter
Peanut butter is one of the most versatile ingredients in your kitchen. You can use it to make breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even snacks. But what do you do if you’re out of peanut butter? Here are some funny peanut butter jokes that will make you laugh.
Ways to make do without peanut butter
If you’re out of peanut butter, never fear! There are plenty of other ways to make do. Here are a few suggestions:
– Use another type of nut butter, such as almond or cashew butter.
– Use tahini (sesame paste) as a substitute.
– Make your own nut butter at home using roasted nuts and a food processor.
– Use sunflower seed butter, which is similar in taste and texture to peanut butter.
– Try chocolate hazelnut spread as a sweet alternative.
