Funny New Year’s Jokes for Kids

Looking for some funny New Year’s jokes for kids? Check out our collection of jokes that are sure to get the little ones laughing.

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Jokes for younger kids

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To get to the other side!

Q. Why did the duck cross the road?
A. To get to the other side!

Q. Why did the mosquito cross the road?
A. To get to the other side!

Q. Why did the banana cross the road?
A. Because he was sick of being mashed!

Q:Why was six afraid of seven?
A:Because seven ate nine

Jokes for older kids

What do you call a reindeer with no eyes? Dazed and confused!

What do you call a reindeer with no eyes and no legs? Still dazed and confused!

How does Santa Claus take pictures? With his North Polaroid!

Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed? Because he had low elf esteem!

How does Santa Claus stay fit? By jogging down chimneys!

What do you get if you cross Santa Claus with a duck? A Christmas quacker!

New Year’s Resolutions

It’s that time of year again! Time to reflect on the past year and set some goals for the new one. What are your New Year’s resolutions? Maybe you want to learn a new skill, or get better grades in school. Maybe you want to be more organized, or be more active. Whatever your goals are, write them down and make a plan to achieve them. And don’t forget to have some fun along the way!

Resolutions for younger kids

Here are some New Year’s Resolutions for younger kids that are sure to bring a smile to your face:

-I will stop saying “everything” when I only mean “something.”
-I will NOT tell my teachers what to do.
-I will try not to interrupt people when they are talking.
-I will raise my hand before I speak in class.
-I will talk to people before I fight with them.
-I will clean up my own messes.
-I want to be a better listener.
-When somebody is upset, I will try to help them feel better.
-I promise to be grateful for what I have.
-I will say “please” and “thank you” more often.

Resolutions for older kids

1. I will not burp, fart or scratch in public.
2. I will not torment small animals unless they tormented me first.
3. I will consult with my Mom or Dad before I do anything that affects the whole family.
4. I will not do my homework until it is actually assigned to me.
5. I will show my gratitude by doing little things without being asked… like taking out the trash and feeding the dog.
6. When it comes to gift giving, I will think of others first and myself last.
7. I will not tease or call people names especially if they are bigger than me or have more friends than me.
8. If there is a chance something dangerous might happen, I will ask an adult before trying it myself… like jumping off the roof or playing with matches.
9 .I will try new things even if I’m scared or think I won’t like them because you never know until you try!

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