Start your day off with a laugh with these funny morning wood jokes. If you’re looking for a way to wake up your partner with a giggle, or just want to enjoy a few chuckles yourself, these jokes are sure to do the trick.
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We all know that the morning wood is a real thing. But did you know that there are actually jokes about it? If you’re looking for a good laugh, check out these funny morning wood jokes to start your day.
1. Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side of the morning wood!
2. What’s the difference between morning wood and an erection?
An erection is harder to get out of bed in the morning!
3. How does a man show he’s interested in a woman?
He starts by getting a boner!
4. How do you know if a man has morning wood?
The best morning wood jokes
We all know that part of wakefulness is an erection. It’s science. It’s also why there are so many morning wood jokes. After all, what’s funnier than a dick joke?
Whether you’re a morning person or not, we can all agree that there’s nothing quite like a good morning wood joke to start your day. So, we’ve compiled a list of the best morning wood jokes for you to enjoy.
1. “I woke up this morning with a stiff neck and it wasn’t from sleeping funny.”
2. “I used to think that my morning wood was just nature’s way of telling me to get up and tackle the day. But now I realize it’s just nature’s way of telling me I have to pee.”
3. “I’m not saying that I don’t like waking up with morning wood… but it would be nice if it was at least pointing in the right direction.”
4. “My girlfriend says she doesn’t mind my morning wood… but I’m pretty sure she Minds the fact that it has a mind of its own.”
5. “If you think about it, every day is basically just one long battle against morning wood.”
6. “They say that sleep is the best way to combat erectile dysfunction… but I’m pretty sure that waking up with morning wood disproves that theory.”
7. “My therapist says that my obsession with morning wood is normal… but I’m pretty sure she’s just saying that because she knows I can’t afford to see her anymore.”
8. “I used to have a serious problem with morning wood… but then I realized that Viagra is for old people.”
9. “I tried using Viagra for my morning wood problem… but it turns out that blue pills just make my urine turn blue.”
The funniest morning wood jokes
What’s the difference between morning wood and a boner?
Morning wood is when you wake up with an erection and you’re not even thinking about sex. A boner is when you get an erection while thinking about sex.
Why did the guy have morning wood?
Because he woke up!
The most hilarious morning wood jokes
The most hilarious morning wood jokes:
-Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the wood.
-Why did the duck cross the road? To get to the other side of the wood.
-Why did the mosquito cross the road? To get to the other side of the wood.
-Why did the banana cross the road? Because he was sick of being mashed.
-Why did the boy cross the road? To get to the other side.