Funny Kiwi Jokes to Make You Laugh

Check out our collection of funny Kiwi jokes that are sure to make you laugh out loud. If you’re looking for a good laugh, then look no further than our funny Kiwi jokes.

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Jokes about Kiwi Stereotypes

Kiwis are often known for being friendly, easy-going and laid back. They are also known for their sense of humor. So, it should come as no surprise that there are quite a few jokes about Kiwis that focus on these stereotypes. Here are some of the funniest Kiwi jokes that will make you laugh.

Jokes about Kiwi accents

If you want to make someone from New Zealand laugh, crack a joke about their accent. Kiwis are well aware that their way of speaking can be hard to understand, and they’re always ready to laugh at themselves. Here are some of the best jokes about Kiwi accents:

-How do you spell “Kiwi”? with a Y?
-Why does the Kiwi accent sound so strange? because it’s a combination of British and Australian!
-What do you call a Kiwi with a non-Kiwi accent? lost!

Jokes about Kiwi food

Kiwi food is often joked about, but that doesn’t mean it’s not delicious! Here are some hilarious jokes about Kiwi food to make you laugh.

-Why did the kiwi cross the road? To get to the other side of the fridge!

-What do you call a kiwi who doesn’t like fruit? A Kiwano!

-Why did the kiwi go to the restaurant? Because he wanted something a little more exotic than toast!

-How do you make a kiwi float? By putting it in a glass of 7 Up!

-What do you call a kiwi with no legs? A fruit roll up!

Jokes about Kiwi sports teams

Why are New Zealand sports teams so successful?
Because they always have a world-class coach.

Jokes about Kiwi Culture

Kiwis are known for their sense of humor, so it’s no surprise that there are plenty of jokes about Kiwi culture. From their love of rugby to their accents, there’s a lot to laugh about when it comes to Kiwis. Here are some of the funniest jokes about Kiwi culture that will make you laugh out loud.

Jokes about Kiwi slang

Although we Americans like to think we’re the only ones with unique slang terms, that simply isn’t the case. In fact, every country has their own way of speaking that is often difficult for outsiders to understand. New Zealand is no different, and their Kiwi slang is some of the most difficult to decipher.

Don’t believe us? Just try to decipher these funny jokes about Kiwi culture:

What do you call a sheep in New Zealand?
A woolly bully!

What do you call a fast moving sheep in New Zealand?
A woolen rocket!

How do you say “please” in Kiwi slang?
Pleeze!

Jokes about Kiwi customs

How do you know if a Kiwi is married?

-There’s a ring around his tiki!

Why did the Kiwi cross the road?

-To get to her hongi!

Why are Kiwis such good drivers?

-They’re used to herding sheep!

Jokes about Kiwi holidays

It’s not always easy to find things to joke about when it comes to Kiwi culture, but here are a few that might get you laughing.

-Q: What do you call a Kiwi who takes a holiday?
-A: A truant!

-Q: Why are Kiwis such bad liars?
-A: Because they’re always getting caught out by the punchline!

-Q: What’s the best thing about Kiwi holidays?
-A: You can always be sure that there will be lots of BBQs!

Jokes about Kiwi Animals

If you’re looking for some funny kiwi jokes to make you laugh, you’ve come to the right place. Kiwi animals are some of the most unique in the world, and there are plenty of jokes to be made about them. Here are a few of our favourites.

Jokes about Kiwi birds

Do you know why kiwi birds are so bad at hide-and-seek? Because they’re not very good at camo-flauging!

Why did the kiwi bird cross the road? To get to the other side!

What do you call a kiwi bird with a dictionary? A know-it-all!

Jokes about Kiwi insects

There are no mosquitoes in New Zealand. If you see one, it’s a Russian tourist.

What do you call a mosquito with a tin roof? A strip tease artist.

What kind of mosquito can produce natural yoghurt? The ones that live in Greece.

How does a mosquito stop a lawnmower? By biting the spark plug.

Jokes about Kiwi mammals

There are no native land mammals in New Zealand, but we do have some hilarious jokes about the ones that have been introduced!

Why did the bat cross the road?

To get to the other cave!

What do you call a group of bats?

A colony or a roost!

How does a bat find its way around in the dark?

By using echolocation!

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