Sometimes you just need a little laugh. Check out our collection of funny glasses jokes that are sure to make you smile.
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Jokes
These glasses jokes are perfect for making people smile. If you are looking for a way to brighten somebody’s day, then telling them one of these jokes is a great way to do it.
Short jokes
Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was…two tired!
Why did the gym close down? It just didn’t work out!
You know what I saw today? Everything I looked at.
Why are ghosts such bad liars? Because they are easy to see through.
Long jokes
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the mosquito cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the banana cross the road?
Because he was sick of being mashed!
Why did the boy cross the road?
To get to school!
Puns
Glassez n’est pas toujours une bonne idée.
Short puns
I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.
I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
Why did the gym close down? It just didn’t work out!
Why are ghosts such bad liars? Because they are easy to see through.
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
Long puns
Puns can be a great way to make someone smile, especially if they’re tired or having a bad day. If you’re looking for some funny glasses puns to brighten someone’s day, or just want to make yourself smile, here are some of our favorites.
-What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
-What do you call a snowman with a four-pack? A quaternion!
-Why did the hipster burn his mouth on his coffee? Because he drank it before it was cool!
-Why did the rooster cross the road? To get to the other side!
-Why did the chicken go to law school? To get to the other side of the bar exam!
After much deliberation, I’ve decided that my new year’s resolution will be to breastfeed my chickens.
I tried out for the part of Batman’s butler, but I didn’t quite make the cut.
I wanted to be an astronaut when I grew up, but I never had the Spaceballs.
One-liners
If you need a reason to smile, look no further than these funny glasses jokes. From one-liners to puns, these jokes will make you laugh.
Short one-liners
1. I tried to be normal once. Worst two minutes of my life.
2. My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that.
3. I’m great at multi-tasking – I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
4. Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.
5. I was diagnosed with OCD – Obsessive Christmas Disorder.
6. If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving isn’t for you.
7. If we could only turn back time… Oh look, a penny!
Long one-liners
These long one-liners are so funny and witty that you will be surprised how quickly the time passes when you are reading them. You will find yourself chuckling at the sheer cleverness of some of these jokes.
-Why did the chicken wear glasses?
To see the salad!
-Why did the duck wear glasses?
To see the salad!
-Why did the mosquito wear glasses?
To see the salad!
-Why did the banana wear glasses?
To see the salad!
