If you’re an English major or just love reading and writing, check out these funny English major jokes. You’ll love them!
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Table of Contents
Jokes
If you’re an English major, you know that the best way to cope with the stress of classes is to laugh about it. And what’s more stressful than English class? Having to deal with all the jokes people make about English majors! But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered. Here are some of the best jokes about English majors.
Q: Why don’t English majors ever write? A: Because they can’t spell “check.”
Q: Why don’t English majors ever write?
A: Because they can’t spell “check.”
Q: What do you say to an English major with a job? A: “Can I have your order?”
Q: What do you say to an English major with a job?
A: “Can I have your order?”
Q: How many English majors does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Just one, but she’ll get three credit hours for it.
Q: How does an English major define a “50/50” chance?
A: Roll of a die.
Limericks
There once was an English major named Claire
There once was an English major named Claire
Who dozed in class and played with her hair.
The professor said, “Wake up!”
But she continued to nap,
And now she sleeps through life without a care.
Who found all her jobs through Indeed.com
There once was a gal from St. Paul
Who found all her jobs through Indeed.com
She applied with great zeal
And got hired with ease
Now she brags that she’s Indeed the ruler!
She applied to be a writer
A woman decided she wanted to be a writer so she applied to be aLimerick writer. The next day she got a letter from the company that said, “You are not qualified to be a Limerick writer because you are not witty enough.”
But they told her, “You’re not qualified.”
An English major went to apply for a job,
But they told her, “You’re not qualified.”
She asked, “Why not? I have a degree.”
They said, “We need someone with experience.”
Puns
As an English major, I’m always on the lookout for good puns. I recently came across a few that made me laugh out loud. If you’re an English major, or just appreciate a good pun, I think you’ll enjoy these.
I’m an English major and I’m having deja vu all over again.
I’m an English major and I’m having deja vu all over again.
I’m an English major and I’m a little worried. I just realized that I have a lot of unfinished business.
I’m an English major and I’m a little worried. I just realized that I have a lot of unfinished business.
I still need to finish my novel, my collection of short stories, my memoir, my blog, and my Pinterest board full of inspirational quotes.
I need to read all of the classics that I’ve been meaning to get to, and I need to watch all of the amazing TV shows and movies that everyone keeps talking about.
I also need to learn how to cook, because let’s be honest, ramen noodles are not going to cut it forever.
But most importantly, I need to find a way to make all of this fit into my already very busy schedule.
Wish me luck!
I’m an English major and I’m feeling a little down. I just realized that I have a lot of unfinished books.
I’m an English major and I’m feeling a little down. I just realized that I have a lot of unfinished books.
