Funny Jokes about Cremation

Cremation is becoming more and more popular, but that doesn’t mean it’s not without its downfalls. Check out our funny jokes about cremation!

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Introduction

Cremation is an increasingly popular option for disposition of human remains. In the United States, the cremation rate has risen from 3.56% in 1960 to nearly 50% in 2016.1 With this increase in popularity has come an increase in jokes about cremation. Here are some of our favorites:

Q: How do you make a dead baby float?
A: A gallon of root beer and two scoops of ice cream.

Q: How does a rabbi make coffee?
A: Instant!

Q: Why don’t Scientologists believe in cremation?
A: Because it’s against thetan rights.

Q: How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.

The Benefits of Cremation

Cremation has many benefits over traditional burial methods. For one, it is much more affordable. The average cost of a funeral can be upwards of $10,000, while the average cost of cremation is only $1,500.

Cremation is also more convenient than burial. With cremation, there is no need to worry about the logistics of transporting a body to a crematorium or cemetery. The body can be cremated on-site, and the ashes can be transported to wherever they need to go.

Cremation is also more environmentally friendly than burial. When a body is buried, it takes up precious land that could be used for other purposes. Cremation requires no land, and the ashes can even be scattered in a favorite spot.

If you are considering cremation for yourself or a loved one, be sure to check out our list of the top 10 benefits of cremation.

The Disadvantages of Cremation

Cremation has a number of disadvantages that you should consider before making your final arrangements.

1. Cremation is more expensive than burial.
2. Cremation takes longer than burial.
3. Cremation is not as environmentally friendly as burial.
4. Cremation leaves behind ashes that can be scattered or stored.

The Process of Cremation

Cremation is the process of reducing the human body to bone fragments using high temperatures. The process typically takes place in a crematorium, which is a special facility built for this purpose.

Cremation is an increasingly popular option for those who wish to dispose of their bodies in a way that is environmentally friendly and/or less expensive than traditional burial. Cremation also allows for more creative options when it comes to memorialization, such as scattering the ashes in a place that was significant to the deceased.

If you are considering cremation for yourself or a loved one, there are a few things you should know about the process. This article will provide an overview of cremation, as well as some funny jokes about cremation that you can share with your friends and family to help lighten the mood.

So, what exactly happens during cremation? The body is placed in a special chamber, called a retort, where it is subjected to intense heat ranging from 1,000 to 1,800 degrees Fahrenheit. The average time it takes to reduce the body to bone fragments is two hours; however, larger bodies may take longer.

Once the process is complete, the bone fragments are swept into a cooling tray and then pulverized into powder using a machine called an “automatic cremulator.” The powder, which is now referred to as “ashes” or “cremains,” can be placed in an urn or scattered in a location that was significant to the deceased.

While cremation may seem like a simple process, there are actually many steps involved and strict regulations that must be followed in order to ensure that the remains are handled with care and respect. If you are considering cremation for yourself or a loved one, be sure to do your research and choose a reputable cremation provider who can answer all of your questions and put your mind at ease.

The Cost of Cremation

The cost of cremation is rising all the time. Some cremation providers now charge as much as $1,000 for the service. That’s a lot of money for something that is supposed to be “final.”

There are ways to reduce the cost of cremation, however. One way is to choose a less expensive cremation provider. Another way is to plan ahead and pre-pay for the service.

If you are planning on cremating your loved one, be sure to ask about the cost of the service before you make any final arrangements.

The History of Cremation

Cremation is the process of reducing the human body to its basic elements through high-temperature combustion. The word “cremation” comes from the Latin cremare, meaning “to burn.”

Cremation has a long and rich history, dating back to ancient times. The first recorded instance of cremation was in 2200 BC in India. In the centuries that followed, cremation became increasingly popular, particularly in Asia and Europe.

The modern cremation process was invented in 1873 by a man named Francis Crumpton. Crumpton’s invention led to a dramatic increase in the popularity of cremation, and today it is estimated that over 50% of people in the United States choose to be cremated.

There are many reasons why people choose cremation, including cost, convenience, and personal preference. For many people, cremation simply offer a more peaceful and dignified end than traditional burial.

The Future of Cremation

Cremation is becoming more popular every year, and it’s not hard to see why. It’s cheaper than a traditional burial, it’s more environmentally friendly, and it’s a lot less hassle for the loved ones of the deceased.

There are some who worry that cremation will lead to the decline of traditional funeral rites and ceremonies, but there is no need to worry. Cremation can be conducted with all the same pomp and circumstance as a traditional burial. In fact, many people find that cremation provides more opportunities for personalization and creativity.

If you’re considering cremation for yourself or a loved one, here are some funny jokes about cremation to help lighten the mood:

-Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side…of the crematorium!

-What do you call a skeleton who refused to be cremated? A holdout!

-Why did the zombies choose cremation? They wanted to go out in a blaze of glory!

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