Check out our collection of funny and corny dog jokes that are sure to make you laugh. These jokes are perfect for dog lovers of all ages.
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Table of Contents
Jokes
Dogs are one of the most popular pets in the world. They provide us with companionship, love, and loyalty. It’s no wonder we love them so much! We also love to make jokes about them. If you’re looking for some hilariously corny dog jokes, you’ve come to the right place.
Short jokes
Q. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
A. An abdominal snowman!
Q.What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
A. Claustrophobia!
Q: Where does Santa go to find reindeer with invisible antlers?
A: Switzerland!
Medium jokes
What do you call a dog that can do math?
A puppy-lop!
Why don’t dogs make good dancers?
Because they have two left feet!
Why did the boy bring a ladder to school?
To get to his class on time!
How does a dog stop a video?
By pressing the paws button!
Long jokes
These jokes are extra-long for those times when you need a laugh that will last a little longer. Dogs feature heavily in these silly jokes, so if you’re looking for dog puns or dog-related humor, you’ve come to the right place.
How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank his coffee before it was cool.
Why wouldn’t the Old English Sheepdog play cards with the Poodle?
Because the Poodle was a cheetah.
Why was the border collie so stressed out?
He was herding cats.
What kind of coffee does a leopard drink?
Any kind he wants.
What do you call it when a chihuahua tells time?
A watchdog.
Puns
If you’re like me, you love a good dog pun. They’re just so cute and cheesy! I’ve rounded up some of the best dog puns I could find, and I hope you enjoy them as much as I do.
Short puns
These short puns are perfect for when you need a quick laugh.
-What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
-How does a dog stop a video? By pressing paws!
-What’s a dog’s favorite movie? The Sound of Mucus!
-What do you call it when a dog goes to the beach? A sand paw print!
Medium puns
Don’t sweat the petty things and don’t pet the sweaty things.
I’m not a procrastinator, I’m just late.
I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure.
I wanted to be a banker, but I couldn’t quite count on it.
I tried to catch some fog earlier, I mist.
What’s the best way to describe it when a woman says “She’s not into you?” She told you.
Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats!
Long puns
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did the dog cross the road?
To get to his bone!
Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Riddles
Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! Why did the dog cross the road? I don’t know, but it was probably chasing a cat! If you’re looking for a good laugh, then check out our collection of funny and corny dog jokes.
Short riddles
Q. What did one eye say to the other?
A. Don’t look now but something between us smells!
Q: How does a dog stop a videocassette?
A: It pushes the EJECT button
Q: Why did the computer squeak?
A: Someone stepped on its mouse!
Medium riddles
Here are some medium difficulty riddles for you to sink your teeth into. If you can get all of them right, then you might just be a genius!
1. I’m not alive, but I grow; I don’t have lungs, but I need air; I don’t have a mouth, but water kills me. What am I?
2. What has a heart that doesn’t beat?
3. What has a head but never weeps?
4. What has a bed but never sleeps?
5. What has a mouth but never speaks?
6. I have cities, but no houses. Mountains, but no trees. And oceans, but no water. What am I?
7. You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again you don’t see a single person on the boat. Why?
Long riddles
Q. Why did the chicken go to the seance?
A. To get to the other side
Q. Why did the gym close down?
A. It just didn’t work out!
Q: You see a boat filled with people. It has not sunk, but when you look again you don’t see a single person on the boat. Why?
A: All the people were married
