Funny Contractor Jokes to Make Your Day

Looking for a good laugh? Check out our collection of funny contractor jokes. From bad job sites to dealing with difficult customers, we’ve got jokes to help you get through your day.

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Table of Contents

Joke #1

Why did the contractor buy a broken microwave?

So he could make instant popcorn!

Joke #2

Why did the Contractor cross the road?

To get to the other side!

Joke #3

Why did the contractor go bankrupt?

Because he charged by the hour!

Joke #4

Why did the contractor buy a new truck?
so he could haul away his old one!

Joke #5

A man approaches a contractor and ask him how much it will cost to have a new roof put on his house.
The contractor tells him that it will cost about $4,000.
The man asks the contractor if he can do it for less.
The contractor says that he can do it for $3,500.
The man then asks the contractor if he can do it for $3,000.
The contractor says that he can do it for $2,500.
The man then asks the contractor if he can do it for $2,000.
At this point, the contractor is getting frustrated and tells the man that it is impossible to do the job for less than $2,000.
The man then asks the contractor if he can do it for $1,500.
The exasperated contractor tells the man that it is impossible to do the job for less than $1,500.
The man then asks the contractor if he can do it for $1,000.
At this point, the contractor is angrily tells the man to get lost and not to come back until he is ready to pay a reasonable price.

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Himalay