Funny Captain America Jokes to Make You Smile

Looking for a little bit of laughter in your life? Check out our collection of funny Captain America jokes to help put a smile on your face!

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Jokes about Captain America’s Shield

Why did Captain America’s shield get confiscated by airport security?

Because it was a weapon!

How does Captain America clean his shield?

With Windex!

Jokes about Captain America’s Uniform

Why does Captain America wear red, white, and blue?
So he can blend in with a fireworks display!

What’s Captain America’s favorite type of cheese?

Why did Captain America cross the road?
To get to the other side!

Why is Captain America so strong?
Because he’s patriotic!

Jokes about Captain America’s Powers

Q: Why did Captain America cross the road?

A: To get to the other side!

Q: How does Captain America pour his cereal?

A: With his shield!

Q: How does Captain America brush his teeth?

A: With his shield!

Jokes about Captain America’s Enemies

1. Baron Zemo: “I’m sorry, did I break your concentration?”

2. Red Skull: “What’s the matter, Rogers? Embarrassed to be beaten by a woman?”

3. Crossbones: “Bucky would’ve wanted it this way.”

4. Hydra Agent: “Hail Hydra!”

5. Arnim Zola: “Captain America…how predictable.”

Jokes about Captain America’s Friends

What did Captain America say to his friend before they went into battle?

“Blood, sweat, and tears, my friend.”

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