Laugh it up with these funny boomer jokes. You’ll be sure to smile after reading these jokes.
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Jokes about getting old
Just because you’re getting old doesn’t mean you can’t laugh at yourself. If you’re looking for a good laugh, check out these funny boomer jokes. From jokes about retirement to jokes about grandchildren, we’ve got you covered.
Jokes about retirement
Q: How many retirees to you need to change a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it might take all day.
Q: What’s the best way to describe retirement?
A: Endless weeks vying for the best position on the lounge chair.
Q: How can you tell when a retiree is hungry?
A1: He starts looking through his wallet for pictures of food.
A2: She gets up two hours before she has to be there.
Q. What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A. Snowflakes
Jokes about wrinkles
wrinkles. I don’t have wrinkles, I have laugh lines.”
“I realized that getting old is like being a fine wine. You get better with age.”
“There are three signs of old age. The first is your loss of memory, the second is your loss of memory, and the third is your loss of memory.”
“Old age is when you think twice before you do something stupid.”
Jokes about memory loss
I forget things all the time. Just the other day, I forgot where I put my keys… and my car!
I went to the doctor because I was having trouble remembering things. He told me to get a memory test.
I said, “No, I’d rather have a blood test.”
My wife is so angry with me for forgetting our anniversary that she’s not speaking to me.
I’m going to have to try and remember that!
My wife asked me if I wanted a dish of ice cream.
I said, “Yes, please. What flavors do you have?”
She said, “Vanilla, chocolate…”
I said, “Great! I’ll have one of each!”
Jokes about technology
As a boomer, you remember a time before the internet, cell phones, and social media. You may not be as tech-savvy as the younger generation, but you can still appreciate a good joke about technology. Here are some of our favorites.
Jokes about cell phones
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side… of the cell phone coverage!
Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side… of the pond!
Why did the bee cross the road?
To get to the other side… of the flowers!
Jokes about computers
Q: What do you get when you cross a Pentium II with a Research Grants Council?
A: A duration of about 10 years.
Q: How does Bill Gates enter his house?
A: He uses the password “I’ll be back”.
Q: Why did the computer keep sneezing?
A: It had a virus!
Jokes about the internet
The internet is a wonderful tool that allows us to stay connected with our friends and family, no matter where they are in the world. But it can also be a source of frustration, especially when things go wrong. Here are some funny jokes about the internet that will make you smile.
-Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side of the internet!
-Why did the duck go on the internet? To look for webfoot!
-How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None, that’s a hardware problem!
-Why did the computer squeak? Because someone stepped on its mouse!
-How do you catch a cheetah? You tie him to a post and wait for a rabbit to run by!
Jokes about family
If you’re looking for some funny boomer jokes, then you’ve come to the right place. We’ve gathered some of the best jokes about family that will make you smile. From jokes about grandparents to jokes about parents, we’ve got it all covered. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the laughs.
Jokes about kids
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the mosquito cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Why did the banana cross the road?
Because he was sick of being mashed!
Why did the boy cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Jokes about spouses
Here are some funny jokes about spouses that will make you smile.
-What’s the best way to keep your spouse from snoring? Put a bar of soap under their pillow!
-How does a husband usually prevent his wife from blurting out embarrassing information at parties? He holds her hand!
-How many spouses does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but it takes the whole weekend!
Jokes about parents
Why did the chicken go to the seance?
To get to the other side
Why did the duck go to rehab?
Because he was a quack addict!
Why did the turkey cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why did grandma cross the road?
To get to the other side!