Funny Birth Control Jokes to Make You Laugh

We’ve all been there – that moment when you realize you’ve forgotten to take your birth control. It can be a total panic-inducing moment. But don’t worry, we’ve got you covered with our list of funny birth control jokes to make you laugh.

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We all know that birth control is serious business. But that doesn’t mean it can’t be funny, too! Here are some funny birth control jokes to make you laugh.

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side of the condom factory!

Why did the duck cross the road?
To get to the other side of the diaphragm factory!

Why did the mosquito cross the road?
To get to the other side of the mosquito net factory!

The Pill

What’s the best way to keep birth control pills from being taken by mistake?

By putting them in a difficult-to-open childproof container!

How do you know if a woman is on the Pill?

She’s either pregnant or she’s not.

The Patch

The Patch is a birth control method that you can wear on your body. It releases hormones into your system that prevent you from getting pregnant.

The Ring

The Ring is a type of contraception that is inserted into the vagina. It is a small, plastic ring that releases hormones to prevent pregnancy. The hormones in the ring stop ovulation from occurring. The ring also thickens the mucus in the cervix, which makes it difficult for sperm to reach an egg.


IUDs are more than 99% effective at preventing pregnancy. So, if you’re looking for a highly effective method of birth control that is also long-lasting, an IUD may be a good option for you.

There are two types of IUDs available in the United States: the copper IUD and the hormonal IUD. The copper IUD can be used for up to 12 years, while the hormonal IUD can be used for up to 5 years.

If you’re considering an IUD, there are a few things you should know:

IUDs do not protect against STDs, so you will still need to use condoms if you are sexually active with multiple partners.

IUDs can cause some side effects, including cramping, spotting, and heavy bleeding during your period. However, these side effects usually go away after the first few months.

IUDs may also increase your risk of developing pelvic inflammatory disease (PID), but this is usually only a concern if you have multiple sexual partners.


What’s the best way to describe Depo-Provera?

It’s like getting a shot in the arm… every three months!

Natural Family Planning

Barriers like condoms or diaphragms prevent sperm from getting to the egg in the first place, so you don’t have to worry about them. If you’re using a barrier method, you or your partner will need to put it in place before sex. Then, once sex is over, you can remove the barrier and be on your way.


We hope you’ve enjoyed our Funny Birth Control Jokes to Make You Laugh. If you have any other funny jokes about birth control, please share them with us in the comments below. And, if you’re looking for more laughs, be sure to check out our other joke collections, including our list of 55 Hilarious Anti-Jokes That Will Actually Make You Laugh.

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