We all know that astrology can be pretty serious business. But it doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom! In fact, there’s a lot of humor to be found in the stars. Check out our collection of funny astrology jokes to make your day.
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Aries
Aries is the first sign of the zodiac and is known for being impulsive, headstrong, and independent. If you have an Aries friend, you know they’re always up for a good time and a laugh. Here are some funny astrology jokes that are sure to make your Aries friend laugh.
What do you call an Aries with two black eyes? Nothing, they’ve never been wrong before.
Why did the Aries cross the road? Because they were sick of being second!
Why are Aries so good at math? Because they’re always adding up!
How does an Aries get to work? They walk- they don’t believe in buses.
Why did the Aries go to therapy? Because they needed help learning how to control their temper.
Taurus
What’s the difference between a Taurus and a baby?
A Taurus is a stubborn, headstrong creature that knows what it wants and won’t hesitate to charge after it. A baby is also a stubborn, headstrong creature that knows what it wants, but is much less likely to actually get it.
Gemini
Gemini is the sign of the twins, and as such, Gemini individuals are known for their dual natures. Gemini people may seem like they have two completely different personalities, and they often do! Gemini individuals are known for being social butterflies, always flitting from one person to the next. They are also known for being witty and charming, and often have a sharp wit that can catch people off guard.
Cancer
People born under the sign of Cancer are said to be loyal, emotional, and intuitive. They are also known for their great sense of humor! Here are some funny jokes about people born under the sign of Cancer.
Why did the Cancer cross the road?
To get to the other side!
Why are Cancers so good at math?
Because they add a lot of heart to their equations!
What do you call a Cancer who has lost all hope?
A melan-Cancer!
Leo
Q: What do you call a Leo with two Black eyes?
A: An optimist
Virgo
Virgo is the sign of the virgin, but you can’t take that too literally. Sure, most Virgos are cautious and choosy about who they get involved with, but once they’ve been swept off their feet, they’re just as passionate as anyone else.
Libra
If you are looking for a sign that is always up for a good time, look no further than Libra! These social butterflies are charming, fun-loving, and always the life of the party. With their quick wit and sharp humor, they are sure to have you laughing all day long. So if you need a pick-me-up, be sure to check out these funny Libra jokes!
Scorpio
Scorpio: You’re so intense!
What’s your sign? Scorpio!
What’s your sign? Intense!
Sagittarius
Sagittarius:
-I’m not really into astrology, but I do know that I’m a Sagittarius. That means I’m into making bad decisions and acting impulsively.
-I’m not really into astrology, but I do know that I’m a Sagittarius. That means I like to live life on the edge and take risks.
-I’m not really into astrology, but I do know that I’m a Sagittarius. That means I believe in shooting for the stars and reaching for my dreams.
Capricorn
What does a Capricorn need to succeed?
An ambition and a mountain.
Aquarius
Aquarius is the eleventh astrological sign in the Zodiac, originating from the constellation Aquarius. Under the tropical zodiac, the sun is in the Aquarius sign between January 20 and February 18.
People born under this sign are often considered to be eccentric, independent, and humanitarian. They are also known for their excellent sense of humor! Here are some funny jokes about Aquarius that are sure to make your day:
“Why did the Aquarius cross the road? To get to the other side!”
“What’s an Aquarius’ favorite color? Aqua!”
“How does an Aquarius find a lost item? By looking for it in a logical place!”
Pisces
Pisces is the twelfth and final sign of the zodiac. Symbolized by two fish swimming in opposite directions, Pisces is known for its psychic ability, creativity, and imagination. Pisces are natural healers and are often drawn to careers in medicine or the helping professions. They are compassionate and sympathetic, but can also be moody and oversensitive. Pisces make loyal friends and devoted partners.
